I miss the old ozone layer

I miss the old ozone layer. I love being outdoors but find that more than 10 minutes of direct sunlight is too much. I am always looking for a shady place. When we moved to California in 2008, I thought the oppressive sun was just from the nonstop sunny skies. But now it’s 2016 and we are living in Western New York, where I find the sunshine as oppressive as ever. The other day it was beautiful, 75° and sunny, though it seemed much hotter in the direct sunlight, perhaps 85° or more. When I finally found shade under a tree, the temperature dropped so significantly that I needed a sweater. That is simply crazy. This was not the story ten years ago. I believe it must be related to the ozone layer.

Now what is the ozone layer and what happened to it? Ozone is a gas made up of three oxygen atoms (O3). The ozone layer is a belt of naturally occurring ozone gas that sits 9.3 to 18.6 miles above Earth and serves as a shield from the harmful ultraviolet B radiation emitted by the sun. Ninety percent of the ozone in the atmosphere sits in the stratosphere. In the lower atmosphere, the troposphere, near the Earth’s surface, ozone is created by chemical reactions between air pollutants from vehicle exhaust, gasoline vapors, and other emissions. At ground level, high concentrations of ozone are toxic to people and plants. The ozone layer is deteriorating due to the release of pollution containing the chemicals chlorine and bromine. According to the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency, one atom of chlorine can destroy more than a hundred thousand ozone molecules. The deterioration allows large amounts of ultraviolet B rays to reach Earth, which can cause skin cancer, weaken immune systems and cataracts in humans and harm animals as well and makes it feel so oppressive when standing in direct sunlight.

Chlorofluorocarbons (CFCs), chemicals found mainly in spray aerosols heavily used by industrialized nations for much of the past 50 years, are the primary culprits to blame for ozone layer breakdown. When CFCs reach the upper atmosphere, they are exposed to ultraviolet rays that cause them to break down into substances that includes chlorine. The chlorine reacts with the oxygen atoms in ozone and rips apart the ozone molecule. About 90 percent of CFCs currently in the atmosphere were emitted by industrialized countries in the Northern Hemisphere, including the United States and Europe. These countries banned CFCs by 1996, and the amount of chlorine in the atmosphere is falling now. But scientists estimate it will take another 50 years for chlorine levels to return to their natural levels.

Can the ozone layer be repaired? Yes, ozone is created and destroyed daily. At one point, we were destroying it faster than it could be replaced – thus holes were created. After doing some googling to check my facts I found that now, it is thought that the holes are being repaired but trapping the warm air – as a result global warming and erratic weather patterns. So, do I miss the ozone layer of the past, yes I do.

My first Father’s Day without my Dad

kissFor the past 50 years, I have been able to wish my Dad a Happy Father’s Day. This is the first year I could not. My Dad took his last breath on April 2, 2016, while I was flying somewhere over Georgia on my way to Ft. Lauderdale. He knew I was coming but could not wait for me to give him one last hug and tell him that I loved him. I am so glad that when I left him in February, I gave him a really big hug during our last visit and I told him how much I loved and appreciated him.

Over the past year, he was getting noticeably frail and I didn’t hug him much for fear of hurting him. I simply kissed his forehead. However, in February, I decided that he really needed a great big hug and kiss and I needed to give it him. My Dad was a real emotional guy and when he received a good hug, he would let out a lovely satisfying ahhh. I am so glad I hugged him; because that was the last time I was with him when he was alive. I have no doubt that he knew how much I loved him and cared for his well being, but hugs make everyone feel better.

talkingLike all Father and Daughter relationships, ours was complicated. I was definitely no “Dad’s Little Girl” or his “Little Princess,” but that is because he shared many of his own strong personality characteristics that made me an independent and confident individual. Aside from these core personality traits, we lived very different lifestyles. All my life, his hands were the softest I had ever felt, which spoke to his lack of physical labor during his lifetime. He appreciated natural beauty by sitting on a porch, beach or boat and he drank it all in; interacting with nature just wasn’t his thing. Unlike me, who lives for getting intimate with the natural world. Although he never really understood my paths, he respected me and the choices I made. There was never a doubt that he loved me unconditionally. That single fact made any disagreement or heated exchanged possible, because I was able to be real, honest and in your face without fear of loss. Sugar coating has never been my specialty. In fact, he nurtured and guided my openness. Whenever I needed to explain a difficult and sometimes distasteful situation he would always comment, “I really appreciate how you were able to explain that so I could understand it better, thank you.”  He provided a safe and accepting environment for me to be me.

Dad and adult DebbieI have just started the long and bumpy mourning process. I’ve been occupying my thoughts with the tasks of settling legal matters, along with taking care of and supporting my Mom, as her life has changed quite a bit since her husband’s death. But ever so often, the reality of no longer sharing this earth with my Dad creeps in and my soul breaks wide open and aches. Luckily, I can still hear his voice when he was strong and full of memories and stories as I recorded an interview I did with him in 2003. But, no more hugs, no more sighs, no more disagreements, no more, “Debbie you are doing the right thing.” All I have are memories and the last kiss I gave him on his forehead in the hospital after his soul left his body.wedding dance